Things I Will Never Do Again
"Happiness is non a goal; information technology's the by-product of a life well lived."
?Eleanor Roosevelt
Nosotros all make mistakes in life, only the people who larn and abound from their mistakes are the happiest ones in the end.
And that'southward precisely what we discuss in today'southward video…
Video Blog Mail:
10 Things Happy People Never Do Over again (video transcript):
Life is modify. Everyone has gone through something that has changed them in a way that prevents them from being the same person they once were. But as my grandmother always told me, this is a very expert matter. Every bit long as yous go along learning and stretching yourself, alter is growth.
Sometimes you accept to accept the fact that things volition never go back to how they used to be, and that this catastrophe is really a new kickoff.
Over the by decade, Angel and I have helped thousands of coaching clients and blog subscribers (subscribe hither) get their lives dorsum on rail. In the process of doing so, we have discovered that the people who have the greatest potential for renewed happiness seem to have specific "aha" moments that totally alter the trajectory of their thoughts and behaviors. Once this "aha" light bulb goes off in their minds, they awaken to a new reality that motivates them to never go back to their old way of doing things.
In short, these "aha" moments hateful they got it. Whatever it was they were doing or thinking that was holding them back, is now a lesson learned and a affair of the past.
Although life has many of import lessons to teach us, Angel and I have observed and studied x specific gateways – or "aha's" – of learning that the happiest people go through, never to return again.
Happy people never again…
- Try to be anyone other than who they are. – In everything y'all practise, you must ask, "Why am I doing this? Is this helping me grow? Does it represent who I am and who I hope to become?" Truth be told, trying to be anyone else is a waste material of the person you lot are. Be yourself. Encompass that individual inside you that has ideas, strengths and dazzler like no one else. Exist the person you know yourself to exist – the best version of you – on your terms.
- Effort to exist everything to everyone. – It's impossible to please everyone, and you shouldn't try. Period. Some people will constantly tell you what you did wrong, and so hesitate to compliment y'all for what you did right. Don't be ane of them, and don't pay attention to them. In one case you go that it truly is incommunicable to delight everyone, you lot begin to live more purposefully, trying to please only the correct people. (Read The Mastery of Love
.)
- Try to modify other people. – You can't change people; they can simply modify themselves. Instead of trying to change others, give them your support and lead by case. If at that place'southward a specific behavior someone yous love has that you're hoping disappears over time, it probably won't. If you really need them to alter something, be honest and put all the cards on the table and so this person knows what you lot need them to do. When yous realize that you can't force people into doing something, even if information technology'southward for their ain skilful, you lot requite them freedom and allow them to experience the consequences. And in doing then, you find your ain freedom as well.
- Make the aforementioned exact error. – You have to respect the wise words of Albert Einstein: "Insanity is doing the same affair over and over again and expecting different results." So whether y'all're in a business situation that isn't making any progress, or a broken human relationship that has proven to exist unhealthy, you lot should never step dorsum into same situation, expecting different results, without something specific and measurable actually being different.
- Choose curt-term pleasance over long-term happiness. – Y'all have to do exactly the opposite – sacrifice short-term pleasure for long-term happiness. Happy people are more interested in something existence constructive than they are in something being easy. While everyone else is looking for the quickest shortcut, they look for the class of activity which will produce the best results over the long term. Living out this principle every single day is 1 of the about cardinal differences between people who live truly rewarding lives and those who don't, both personally and professionally. (Angel and I talk over this in item in the "Goals and Success" chapter of i,000 Little Things Happy, Successful People Do Differently.)
- Expect people and situations to exist perfect. – It's natural for usa to exist drawn to situations and people that appear to exist astonishing. Nosotros dear excellence and should ever exist looking for it. Nosotros should pursue people who are great at what they do, coworkers and employees who are loftier performers, mates who are boggling people, friends who have stellar character, and business partners who excel. Only never lose sight of this simple truth: Aught and nobody is perfect. Period. No ane and no thing is flawless, and if they appear that way, and you wait them to always be that way, you lot will only disappoint yourself.
- Allow one dark cloud encompass the entire sky. – Have a deep jiff. It's just a bad moment, or a bad day, not a bad life. Everyone has troubles. Anybody makes mistakes. The clandestine of happiness is to count your blessings while others are adding up their troubles. For happy people, no i upshot is ever the whole story. They remind themselves of this fact each and every mean solar day.
- Neglect responsibleness for managing their life situation. – Simply put, happy people don't blame others or defer their potency. They take complete responsibility for their actions and outcomes, or their lack thereof. They know it'due south up to them, and only them, to assess and manage their circumstances. Laziness just won't cut information technology. No matter how good something looks at commencement, information technology is only past owning your situation and taking a deeper, diligent, and sincere await that you will find out what you truly need to know: the truth that you owe to yourself.
- Allocate themselves as a victim. – Yep, it's unfortunate that sometimes bad things happen to the all-time of people. Life tin be unfair, unkind and downright unjust. Still, being stuck in a victim mentality does not nurture your ability to move onward and upward. Y'all've got to stand back up and accept positive steps to heal and abound. I of the biggest differences between truly happy people and others is that in every hard life situation – relationships, career, business, money, etc. – happy people always ask themselves, "What role am I playing in this situation? And what are my options from this indicate forwards?" (Read 2d Firsts
.)
- Allow external achievements to overshadow inner happiness. – Nosotros are happy and fulfilled more often than not by who we are on the inside. Scientific research has validated this fourth dimension and fourth dimension once again. And our internal lives largely contribute to producing many of our external circumstances. The trouble is that when we think we have to "look" for things in life similar beloved, meaning and inspiration, the "looking" implies that these things are somehow hiding behind some bushes somewhere, just waiting to be discovered. So we start looking for these things in places that lead u.s.a. further and farther exterior ourselves, which is not where our happiness lives.
Afterthoughts
If yous're struggling with any of the points above, know that yous are not alone. Nosotros all struggle with these things at times. Sometimes nosotros echo mistakes many times before we are able to say "aha" and finally get information technology. Just do your best to wait for the patterns that are holding you dorsum, and and so gradually eliminate them. That's really it…
Your task, in life, in relationships, and in business, is to observe what is NOT working for you, and never go back to doing these things.
Your turn…
What'south i "aha" moment that has helped you detect more happiness? What else has been hurting your happiness that you need to never do again? Leave a comment below and permit us know.
Photograph by: Amanda
Source: https://www.marcandangel.com/2014/07/20/10-things-happy-people-never-do-again/
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